Why new team members don’t ask questions – and how to make it easier for them

Why silence during onboarding is not proof of understanding

Marta joins the customer service department. At the end of her first week her manager asks: “Is everything clear?” She says “yes”, and the next day she gives a customer out-of-date contract terms. The manager is surprised – after all, he encouraged questions at every meeting. The problem is that “Is everything clear?” requires a newcomer to admit publicly that they do not understand something that seems trivial to everyone else. Some employees prefer to look for the information on their own first; others are afraid of sounding incompetent or do not know who can give them an answer. Others still cannot put a question into words until they have tried to do the task. That is why a lack of questions tells you little about how well prepared someone is. Nor should you automatically assume that silence always means fear: sometimes the instructions really are clear. The manager should create an opportunity to check this in practice.

The psychological cost of asking and the role of the manager’s reaction

In a study of 51 manufacturing teams, Amy Edmondson described the link between psychological safety and learning behaviour. It is an important mechanism: people are more willing to take interpersonal risks when they expect that a mistake or a question will not end in humiliation. Elizabeth Morrison, in a literature review on employee voice and silence, shows in turn how much the expected reaction of the listener and the perceived point of speaking up matter. These studies do not allow us to say exactly what Marta is thinking. They do, however, offer practical pointers. If a manager answers a question with “I’ve already said this three times”, that sends a stronger signal than any earlier assurance that “you can ask anything here”. If they admit, “This procedure is complicated – I had to check it several times myself”, they lower the threshold for conversation. It is especially worth responding to questions without irony, because a new person is only just learning which behaviours are safe in this team.

Check whether the employee can actually do the task

A manager can replace general reassurances with a short exercise. After presenting a procedure, they say: “Let’s go through one example together. Show me where you’d find the current offer template and what you’d do if a customer asked for an exception.” This kind of check should not take place in front of the whole team. A joint run-through lets both sides establish whether the problem lies in the instructions, in a lack of access to a tool or in too many exceptions to the rule. It can also help to ask: “Which part of this job took the most searching?” or “What decision did you have to make without reliable information?” That way the employee does not have to assess the overall level of their own knowledge. In work that involves safety or compliance with procedures, this kind of check is particularly important: nodding along does not confirm competence. The manager should also make sure the instructions are up to date and written in language accessible to someone who is only just getting to know the organisation.

Set up three predictable opportunities to ask questions

A single “my door is always open” invitation is not enough if the manager is usually busy and does not reply to messages. In the first few weeks it is worth establishing three channels: a short daily debrief on a completed task, a buddy for minor matters, and a regular slot for questions that need the manager’s decision. The new person should also know where to find current procedures and what to do if something is urgent. If the team works shifts or in a hybrid model, access to support cannot depend solely on meeting at one desk. It is a good idea to spell out the difference between asking about instructions and reporting a mistake: the latter should trigger a corrective procedure, not public shaming. A 2007 meta-analysis by Saks, Uggerslev and Fassina links socialisation tactics with newcomer adjustment. It does not point to one magic form of onboarding; what matters is a consistent process and real access to information.

How to respond when a mistake reveals that questions were not asked earlier

After Marta’s mistake, the manager could say: “But you said you understood everything.” A sentence like that shifts the conversation from a process error to personal blame and may make the next question harder to ask. A better opening would be: “The customer received the old version of the terms. I want to understand where you got it from and at what point information was missing.” They then establish the current source of data together and check who else is using the old document. Only after that does the manager give feedback on how to handle such situations. They might say: “When you’re not sure which version is right, hold off on sending it and ask someone to check. That’s an important rule for us.” It is also worth asking whether deadlines and the pace of work encouraged guessing. If the problem affects many new hires, the way new employees are onboarded needs to be improved, rather than the same instructions being repeated ever more loudly. Responsibility for learning is shared, though not identical.

How to tell whether a new person’s onboarding is really working

The number of questions asked is not a measure of success on its own. Someone may ask a lot because the process is chaotic, or very little because they received excellent materials. It is better to check whether they can carry out real tasks, know the limits of their own decision-making and can say where to get help. In weeks 2, 4 and 8 you can hold a short conversation: “Which tasks can you already do without support?”, “What still needs confirming?”, “Which procedure was unclear?” You should also gather comments from onboarding buddies, but not turn them into an informal ranking of the “bold” and the “shy”. For roles with greater responsibility, it is worth planning a practical check of key competences before the person is allowed to work independently. If a new person does not speak up at group meetings, give them a one-to-one channel or the option of preparing questions in writing. Well-organised onboarding reduces the situations in which you have to guess what the employee has understood.

Questions do not appear just because a manager allows them. You need to create a predictable way of asking them and respond in a way that means the employee does not regret their first attempt. Checking a task together, regular contact and a clear route to help are better than simply saying “feel free to ask”.

How Em helps you hold the first conversation about difficulties

A manager notices that a new specialist nods along but often goes back to the same instructions. He describes the specific situation to Em and asks for an opening that will not sound like an accusation. He gets a suggestion: “I’d like to check whether we’ve prepared you well for this work. Let’s look at one example and the places where you had to guess.” He then practises responding to “I understand everything”: “Good – and which exceptions to the rule are still hard to spot?” If collaboration context is available in the organisation, Em can help tailor the conversation to individual preferences without labelling the new person. The manager also asks for three questions for the end of the first week and a short message to the onboarding buddy. After the conversation, he notes down which materials need improving, who is to provide support and when he will check the next task. As a result, instead of trying to work out the reasons for the silence, he can deliberately build conditions in which doubts come to light early enough.